“Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” Now out of the ground the LORD God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” (Genesis 2:18-24)
Over the past few weeks I have been sharing some suggestions for your consideration in order to strengthen marriages. Today, I am going to share my last suggestion to aid each of us to have the type of great marriage the Lord intends for us to have and enjoy.
Suggestion #4 – Strong marriages have wives who follow the Biblical model given to them by the Lord.
It is nearly impossible to understand the type of woman the Lord wants a wife to aspire without consulting Proverbs 31:10-31
A Godly Wife is Priceless
In Proverbs 31:10, the question is asked, “A wife of noble character, who can find?” and goes on to say, “She is worth far more than rubies.”
What a powerful statement to the world proclaiming that if one manages to find a Godly wife, she is priceless and extremely valuable.
A Husband’s Attitude towards a Godly Wife
Proverbs 10:11-12 – “The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.”
A Godly wife has her husbands’ trust and confidence. She is an absolute asset to him. He knows she will not do anything to cause harm nor will she betray him. She strives to give him everything the Lord values; her patience, kindness, and love. She does not become involved in gossip or slander. She prays for her husband (and family) and protects his name.
A Godly Wife Manages the Home
Proverbs 31:13-19 – “She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands. She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar. She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens. She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard. She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong. She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night. She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle.”
A Godly wife is one who sees that the home is functioning properly. She makes sure her family is fed wholesome, nutritious meals. She is wise with the family budget and contributes financially. If a wife does not work outside the home, she can contribute by using money wisely, and taking care of the finances. A Godly wife also maintains a positive relationship with any service people. She takes great pride and responsibility in the running of her home in order to bring glory to her husband.
A Godly Wife is Kind to Those Less Fortunate
Proverbs 31:20-27 – “She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household are clothed in scarlet. She makes bed coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple. Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them; she delivers sashes to the merchant. Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.”
A godly wife makes sure her family’s needs are always met and is resourceful. Godly wives make a good appearance for not only themselves and for God, but so that their husbands are respected. They do not do anything through either word or deed to draw unwanted attention or criticism.
A Godly Wife’s Is Faithful
Proverbs 31:28-31 – “Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.” Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates.”
God blesses those who are faithful to His word, and wives are to be faithful to their husbands. Wives who bring glory to their husbands, bring glory to God. Her children admire and love her, and her husband is happy and is constantly praising her. Others talk about her favorably, and she is rewarded by God.
A Godly Wife is Submissive “in the Lord”
Ephesians 5:22-24, 33 – “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”
God’s plan for the Christian marriage is given here. Marriage is sacred and God wants men and women to marry and live with their mates until death parts them (Romans 7:l-2). The wife is commanded to obey her husband. The exception is if the husband demands anything of her which is morally or spiritually wrong, she must obey God rather than her husband (Acts 5:29). This is to be a voluntary submission on her part. She does not have this obligation to every man, just her husband.
Some Practical Suggestions for a Godly Wife
- Remember why he fell in love with you in the first place – Remember and build on it. Don’t stop the courtship.
- Be his wife not his child – Learn to handle difficulties like an adult. Be a helper and not a burden. He will appreciate you more if you are a “trooper” when the going gets rough!
- Build him up – No one on earth can build him up as high as you can, and by the same token, no one on earth can tear him down as low as you can. If there is some way you want him to change or develop, encourage him in that direction, but don’t try to push him! Be very considerate of his feelings.
- Strive to live on his salary – Make him feel like he is a very good provider. Never make him feel that he is a failure as a provider.
- Make home a refuge for him – Most men don’t notice if a house is deep-down clean, but they notice if it is upside down. Feed him meals he enjoys. Make sure he realizes that he is more important to you than your parents or your children. Make him glad he came home. Make it obvious to children as well as friends that he is the head of your family.