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Tag Archives: Godly Living

“Living Your Faith Out Loud” by Susan Langford

14 May

Set ApartIs your faith a quiet whisper that you refer to on occasion or is it a life-altering, life-transforming way of life that you fearlessly shout from the rooftops?

The past few weeks I have been pondering this verse in Scripture:

Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.  Then, you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is his; good, pleasing and perfect will. (Romans 12:2 )

As I look around me, sometimes I am overwhelmed when I talk to individuals that genuinely love the Lord, quote scripture, and go to church, but they participate in activities and speak in a manner that contradicts God’s Word and His Truth.  We are all sinners and fall short.  (Romans 3:23)  We all make mistakes.  We all struggle in our walk at times.   I am talking about something totally different in nature.

I am talking about when I encounter a person that I will have a lengthy conversation about God, especially when they find out I am a minister’s wife.  Then, in the same breathe they will say a curse word without thinking anything about it.  I just see some of us falling into the world more and more.  We are getting dragged deeper and deeper.

We are falling into the pattern of the world and not being transformed by the renewal of our mind in His Word.  Compartmentalized Christianity is what I am fearing that believers are falling more and more prey to in this world.  Putting on our Sunday and Wednesday hats when it is convenient for us.

I am going to watch what I want to, I am going to say what I want to, I am going to go where I want to, I am going to live how I want to…….No, No, that is not what His Word teaches us when we become his children.  It a DIFFERENT LIFE!  DIFFERENT-BETTER-RICHER-PURPOSEFUL  LIFE.

So that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe.  (Philippians 2:15)

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.  The old has passed away; behold the new has come. (2 Corinthians 5:17)

But that is not the way you learned Christ!-assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus, to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through the deceitful desires,  (Ephesians 4:20-22)

Have we been transformed by Him that allowed his Son to die for our sins?  Have put off our old self?  Are family member, friends, and neighbors seeing us acting like “aliens” and “strangers” (1 Peter 2:11)  Do they see we are different because we are His children?

I am talking to myself as well.  I pray that I am that “alien” and “stranger” scripture clearly speaks of being.  I am convicted that if we don’t start acting like “aliens” in this world that we are going to blend in, and then, as Christians, how we are going to bring a non-believing neighbor, co-worker, loved one on this amazing journey of faith if we aren’t living a life all about Him.

Transparency is the key to showing and living our faith.  Talking about our relationship with God to our neighbors, to our co-workers, to our unbelieving family members, and friends should be common place.  I am not talking about cramming it down their throats so speak.   I am speaking of sharing how God is moving and working in your life as a Christian.  How has He made your life better, more complete?

Kevin and I have a dear friend that has asked his waiter if there is anything he may pray for him or her about before the meal.  Wow!  What a powerful way to be an “alien!”  For me personally, the loss of my mom, has provided many opportunities for me share with others how God worked in me and through me during one of the most heart-breaking periods of my life.

As Christians, we have to live and breathe that life.  We can’t separate it from other aspects of our lives.  We can’t conform to this world.  We can’t!  Think of Jesus….just take some time this week and read the Gospel accounts.  In the King James version of Luke 2:49, when Mary and Joseph were looking for young Jesus, he says, “……How is it that ye sought me?  wist ye not that I must be about my Father’s business?”    Does that apply to us in 2013?  We must be about our Father’s business as his children.

Our challenge every day of our lives is to be about His business.   Live fearlessly for Jesus.  Be “aliens” and “strangers.”   Our faith is not something is be hidden.  We are not meant to “blend in.”

“Do not conform…..but be transformed….”  Romans 12:2

 
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Posted by on May 14, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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Will You Be My Valentine? ~ God

12 Feb

will you be my valentineAs I watched my wife and son sitting in the floor of the living room preparing for Connors first Valentine’s Day party at school, it brought back memories of when I was a child.  I can remember the anticipation as the minutes seemed to move ever so slowly.  I recall the parents would start arriving at school with frosted cupcakes, little bags of assorted candy, and fruit punch to wash it all down.  The food was all fine and dandy but I wanted the cards!  I couldn’t hardly wait to see if one of the pretty girls in class might give me a special Valentines card to let me know she thought I was cute, nice, or interested in me in some way.  On the other hand, I was a bit nervous at the thought that one of the less attractive girls in my class might express similar interests.  Awkward!

Isn’t it interesting how we have a national holiday which encourages us to give cards to express how we feel about one another?  Last year over 160 million cards were exchanged for Valentine’s Day alone.  At an average price of $1.50 per card, Hallmark alone would profits over $120 million dollars.

Long before Hallmark or Valentine’s Day, the Lord used 40 common men to write to all of humanity the greatest love letter ever assembled.  In this letter he provided mankind with knowledge and understanding of their greatest problem (sin) and the only solution to their problem (Jesus).  He proclaims His vengeance upon those who die in their sin without obeying the gospel and at the same time wants us to realize He is loving, merciful, just, gracious, patient, tender, forgiving, and caring just to name a few.

The most well known and often quoted passage of Scripture declares and reminds us of His love.  In John’s gospel we read, “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life (3:16).”  Yet there are numerous Scriptures in which God proclaims His love toward us.

Romans 8:37-39 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 5:8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Deuteronomy 7:9  Know therefore that the LORD your God is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments, to a thousand generations,

The question I was to challenge you to consider is simply, “What are you doing with His love?”  Are you living a life full of sin?  Are you allowing your selfish desires to take up residency within your heart?  Do you make it a point to be compassionate like Jesus?  Are you more concerned with self or others?  Do you value the message of the gospel to the point you can’t help but share it with others?  Does your love for the Lord cause you to look forward to assembling with other believers on the first day of the week to commemorate the sacrifice made upon the cross through the observance of the Lord’s Supper?  Does the love of God cause you to teach your children diligently about Him and His ways?

Reader Feedback:

I want to hear from you.  Aside from the verses I shared above, what is your favorite scripture, quote, Biblical story, etc which reminds you of the love the Lord has for you? What are you doing with his love?  How is your life different once you came to understand His love for you? Please share your answers in the comment box below.

 
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Posted by on February 12, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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The Blessing of Family Worship

02 Nov

I recently completed some research over the growing percentage of young people (ages 18-29) who are departing the faith and some of the primary factors contributing to the issue.  Parents, ministers, Bible class teachers, and church leaders all across Christendom are deeply concerned with this dilemma.  Depending on which research you find to be most viable; it is estimated that between 60-75% of Christian young people will graduate from high school and walk away from their relationship with the Lord.

It is not my intent during this post to get into the reasons given by those who were once on fire for God but now do not feel the need to follow Jesus.  That will be another post at another time.  But I do want to say that I know with every ounce of my being that Biblical home training MUST become a priority once again if our children are ever going to live a life of faith and holiness.

From the beginning of time, God ordain the home to be THE primary place for spiritual training and developing godly character.  Please notice.

Genesis 18:19 – “For I have chosen him, that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing righteousness and justice.”

Deuteronomy 6:6-7 – “And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”

Psalm 78:1-11 – “Give ear, O my people, to my teaching; incline your ears to the words of my mouth! I will open my mouth in a parable; I will utter dark sayings from of old, things that we have heard and known, that our fathers have told us. We will not hide them from their children, but tell to the coming generation the glorious deeds of the LORD, and his might, and the wonders that he has done. He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers to teach to their children, that the next generation might know them, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, so that they should set their hope in God and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments; and that they should not be like their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation, a generation whose heart was not steadfast, whose spirit was not faithful to God. The Ephraimites, armed with the bow, turned back on the day of battle. They did not keep God’s covenant, but refused to walk according to his law. They forgot his works and the wonders that he had shown them.”

Proverbs 22:6 – “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Ephesians 6:4 – “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”

Many parents understand the command for home training but still chose to ignore this decree from the Lord.  Many others understand their responsibility but are not sure where to begin or who to implement faith training within their own home.  The need for spiritually mature men and women to help train the younger generation (Titus 2:1-8) how to live and leave a Godly legacy is at a very high level.  Churches can aid in this need by providing resources and encouraging these two groups to come together and minister to one another with a humble heart and spirit.

Even though I am a father of a young family, my wife and I am constantly working daily to impress faith and to live our relationship for our children.  We have come to quickly realize the value and blessing in fulfilling the command from the Lord within our own home.

Family Worship bonds the family together in the Lord (2 Timothy 1:5)

It is a very exciting time for our family to be able to gather around our son’s bed at night and read the Word of God together and spend time in family prayer.  You will be hard pressed to find something more meaningful and heartwarming than hearing your children pray.  Not only is it a time of worship but it can easily provide a great avenue for laughter.  Our son has prayed for some very unique and interesting things.  As a minister, it has provided me some opportunities to talk to my son about preaching, prayer, service, fellowship, and song leading to name a few.  He gets excited when we spend time with other Christians who love him and provide a godly example for his to see.

Family Worship makes the father the spiritual leader (Ephesians 6:4)

Sadly, far too many men are not heeding the call from the Lord to be the spiritual leader of the home.  Many of them are intimidated or discouraged.  By implementing family worship when your children are small, it allows the father to grow in his spiritual walk and abilities as his children grow.  Many times the children will not remember what their parents said but will remember the example they set.  Family Worship allows the father to grow in his role as the spiritual leader of his home.

Family Worship is What God commanded (Deuteronomy 6:4)

Scripture is very clear on what the Lord expects of us as parents.  We are not to live a life of fear, but a life of power, love, and self-control (2 Timothy 1:7).  Regardless of what other parents/families are doing.  We have chosen to take the Lord at His word and are doing our very best to live our His command to teach/train our children about Him and His Ways.

Family Worship Helps us to Learn God’s Ways (Psalm 119:97-103)

What a delight it is to spend in God’s Word.  To realize it has the power to encourage, mold, and help us to become more like Jesus is so refreshing and exciting.  The more time we spend with Scripture the better our relationship will be as a family and as members of the household of God.

Family Worship Will Save Your Family (2 Timothy 3:15)

As parents we go through so many measures to make sure our homes and vehicles are safe.  We do our very best to make sure they are always in a safe environment when they are not in our sight.  Why?  Because we want to protect them from harm and those who could hurt them.  As important as these measures are, they fail in comparison to our role in helping save them from spiritual sin.  When we implement Family Worship, we are doing our part in helping save them from themselves, a life of trouble and heartache, and an eternity of punishment and despair.

By no means is this list exhaustive but I do hope you can see the value and benefits of Family Worship.  May the Lord bless each of you richly as we all strive to develop families of faith and holiness.

 
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Posted by on November 2, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

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“We Need to Communicate”

24 Oct

No matter how hard we each try to clearly communicate, there are times in which miscommunication occurs thus often leaving feelings of bitterness and discontentment between the two parties involved.  Recently, I found myself in such a predicament.  Working with a church of over 400, it is very easy for me to be striving to communicate one thing only to discover the listener(s) heard me convey something completely opposite.  A few weeks back I was made aware of some hurt feelings from some of our teenagers in regards to my perceived treatment and attitude towards others in our church family.  Upon learning of this situation I knew something must be done quickly to try and right the wrong.   I felt this situation was a great way to give my high school class a real life example in how to Biblically handle conflict between two persons.  Therefore, we looked at the passages dealing with communication and overcoming offenses between to parties.  Thankfully, all parties were able to come together and discuss the problem with a spirit of love and unity.  As a result of following God’s plan, unity and harmony have been restored.

Sadly, I am of the opinion that most people are not willing to do the steps necessary to reconcile disagreements and miscommunication with others.  Quite often we learn that another individuals feelings are hurt from persons other than the one who was originally involved.  This must not be!  We must do everything in our power to not allow there to be room for gossip and /or slander against another.

Jesus gives us a clear model for restoring harmony when problems arise between two parties.  These principles are not only effective within the church but apply to all other relationships as well.

If there is a conflict, you must handle it immediately.

Matthew 5:23-24 – “So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.”

Jesus uses a Jewish illustration.  They worshipped God by bringing a gift to the altar.  In order for this worship to be acceptable, they must be sure that they are at peace with their brother.  In this passage the responsibility is upon the person who did the wrong.  There is no excuse for long standing feuds in the church.  He teaches a person’s heart must be right when he worships God.  If a person does not have a right relationship with his brother, he cannot have a right relationship with God (I John 4:20).  The worshipper must stop worshipping and reconciliation must take place.  In order for there to be forgiveness of sins, one must acknowledge his sins.  He must repent of it.  He must seek to make restitution if possible.  If another person is involved, he must ask their forgiveness.  Only when one has a right relationship with his brother, will God accept his worship.

If there is a conflict, it is your responsibility to act.  God commands it!

Matthew 18:15 – “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.”

Luke 17:3 – “Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him,”

Galatians 6:1 – “Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.”

1 Timothy 5:19-20 – “Do not admit a charge against an elder except on the evidence of two or three witnesses. As for those who persist in sin, rebuke them in the presence of all, so that the rest may stand in fear.”

God’s Word shows us how we are to act.  If one’s brother sins against him, the disciple should go to him personally and show him his wrong in the spirit of meekness.  It should be remembered that it is sin that will cause one to be eternally lost that is discussed.  It is not some imaginary wrong or grievance.  The spirit must be one of love.  One wants his brother to repent so that he can be forgiven and be saved.   If it was not a sin, but an imagined grievance on one’s part, this will be cleared up by confrontation.  One must not brood over the sin and gender hatred toward his brother; the person sinned against must go to the offending person.  He is not to go to others and talk about him and run him down, he must go to him.  If it is a misunderstanding, it needs to be clarified.  If the brother did sin and he repents, he must be forgiven.  In this case, the offended person has gained a brother.

Prayerfully after you have sat down with the other party peace and harmony will be restored.  However there may be times in which additional measures must be taken.  Notice how the Lord shares with us these additional steps to take in hopes of restoring fellowship with another.

If there remains conflict, it is the responsibility of the one who has been unsuccessful in gaining reconciliation to take two or three witnesses and confront the erring Christian a second time.

Matthew 18:16 – “But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses.”

The offended brother is to go alone to the brother who sinned against him.  If the brother who sinned does not listen and repent, then the offended person is to go back with one or two other brothers.  The idea of two or three witnesses goes back to the Old Testament (Deuteronomy 17:6; 19:15).  It is repeated in the New Testament (John 8:17; II Corinthians 13:1; Hebrews 10:28).  The first purpose is to seek to persuade the guilty person to seek ways for forgiveness to be granted and reconciled to his fellow man and God.  The witnesses are to be fair and see who is at fault.  If the brother who sinned refuses to acknowledge his sin and repent, the witnesses can give a true account of what went on at the second meeting.  They can verify what was said and the spirit in which it was said.

If repentance and reconciliation are not achieved, it is the responsibility of the individual and the witnesses to tell it to the church.

Matthew 18:17 – “If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.”

The final step in seeking to restore fellowship with the brother who sinned is to take it unto the church.  The church hears the issue and seeks to bring the brother to repentance.  At this stage the issue is still to be resolved.  The church elders must take the lead; however, they may want the help of others who have influence with this brother.

You may be reading this and thinking, “That is a lot of work!”  “It is easier for me to just remain quiet and keep my distance from the one which I am experiencing conflict.”  I would respond…”The easiest way is not always the best way.”  Our Lord knows that we need each other and understands the need to communicate to restore unity between two conflicting individuals.  It is very important for us to follow His plan for a few primary reasons.

  1. To resolve misunderstandings.  Most offenses result from misunderstandings and many can be resolved quickly if the offended parties would just go to the source and find out the facts.  Unfortunately, most offended people will just internalize the offense silently while growing bitter and resentful.   I would also like to add.  If you find yourself caught between two conflicting individuals or you are hearing others talk about it.  Go straight to the two parties at odds with one another and encourage them to sit down and talk out their problems.  Talking to everyone about the conflict other than the one with whom there is a conflict will not bear anything good.
  2. To maintain peace.  Whenever there is friction or turmoil between two parties it affects everyone.  Within the church, it hinders people from entering into worship and receiving God’s Word.  It also creates an uninviting atmosphere for visitors to the church.  Unresolved issues can ultimately prevent others from coming to Christ.
  3. To hold the offender accountable.   Persons who bring offense against you are likely to repeat similar acts against others.  Confronting their offensive behavior may cause them to learn from the experience and not cause further issues.
  4. To restore a fallen brother.  Christians must make every effort to restore brothers and sisters in Christ who have fallen into sin.

We must realize that the Lord knows best in both this life and the life to come.  Christians must be the example for how to handle conflict properly because the world is watching.  I leave you with the following, “Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel”(Philippians 1:27).

 
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Posted by on October 24, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

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“Don’t Be A Moron! – Life Lessons from the Two Builders

28 Aug

I recently asked a large class of teenagers to share what they recall from the greatest sermon they ever heard.  It was encouraging to hear them one by one begin to share where they were, the subject being presented, and how that lesson impacted their lives.  I was a bit saddened to learn that not one of them mentioned one of my sermons; but that is okay.

As we find ourselves sitting beside the multitude listening with anticipation to Jesus preach on “The Sermon on the Mount” we hear Jesus say the following, “Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it.” And when Jesus finished these sayings, the crowds were astonished at his teaching, for he was teaching them as one who had authority, and not as their scribes.” (Matthew 7:24-29)

When Jesus finished his sermon the people were amazed!  They had never heard anyone preach like that before.  Jesus spoke as one with great authority.  He called for people to act on what they heard.  He called them to make a life commitment.  He called them to live differently as a result of hearing His sermon.

As I began to study deeper into this familiar text I began to see some strong similarities as well as differences between these two men.

Similarities between the Builders

  1. Both Heard the Words of Jesus – Jesus begins His conclusion by saying, “Whoever hears these words of mine…”  Jesus is not only talking about the words he is about to say but is referencing his entire sermon and ministry.  Notice that both builders were represented in the crowd as Jesus spoke.
  2. Both Built a House – Building a house take great effort.  I recall those times my family aided my dad in building his log home.  It is hard work.  Try as I may, the house did not build itself.  It took personal effort and responsibility.  The same is true with our spiritual house.  No one can build it FOR us, we must build it OURSELVES.
  3. Both Experienced a Crisis -   Notice the words from verses 25 and 27, “And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house…”  Regardless of who we are, we have all gone through our own times of crises haven’t we?

Differences in the Two Builders

  1. One is wise; the other foolish – Upon deeper study, we find out the wise man is one who is thoughtful or discreet.  The Greek word to describe this man is φρόνιμος (phronimos).  On the other hand I found it interesting that Jesus describes the foolish man as μωρός (mōros) which literally means stupid or a moron.  Note that neither of these words had to do with a person’s I.Q. but everything to do with his or her willingness to hear the words of Jesus and apply them.
  2. The preparation for the crises is different – In both situations the rains descended and the floods came and the winds blew.  The word for “flood” is used to describe a great river.  To fully comprehend this we need to have some understanding of the terrain in Palestine.  Palestine is comprised of hills and valleys.  In the late winter and early spring the mountain rains come.  The rains channel down between these mountains causing a might river to form, destroying any and everything in their path.  The wise man built his house up on the rock ledge or rock outcropping.  This builder chose the higher ground, the more difficult location.  He built his house on THE rock, which is Jesus Christ.  However; the foolish man built his house in the dry riverbed.  He built it in the direct path of trouble.  Trouble came for both men.  However; only one was able to withstand the storm.
  3. The final outcome – The wise man’s house did not fall.  Why? Because it was founded upon THE rock (2 Timothy 2:19; 1 Timothy 6:19).  The foolish man didn’t fare as well.  In fact, the text says “and great was the fall of it”.  We each must choose where we will build our house.  Prayerfully we will take the time to build a proper house of faith on Jesus and His Word.

I share these points with you today to ask a few simple questions.  How is the construction going?  Are you taking the personal time to build a faith that will withstand any storm you may face?  Are you building your home on a foundation which will fail you or are you putting forth the additional and needed effort to build it on THE rock?  May we each do the things necessary to develop a strong and satisfying faith with our Father, His Son, His Word, and His bride!  May God bless each of you richly!

 
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Posted by on August 28, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

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“Adultery: More than you want to pay”

05 Jun

Recently I have become more and more aware of married couples who are engaging in adulterous relationships.  As our current culture trends in a downward spiral, this act is sadly becoming more and more accepted.  I took the time to do a little research and the following statistics seem to reinforce my personal views based upon study of God’s Word.

Proverbs 6:32 – He who commits adultery lacks sense; he who does it destroys himself.

Please note that given the secretive nature of infidelity, exact figures about cheating and extra-marital affairs are nearly impossible to establish.  Listed below are some of the most well-supported facts about cheating.  http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/cheating-and-infidelity/stats-about-infidelity.html

  • It is estimated that roughly 30 to 60% of all married individuals (in the United States) will engage in infidelity at some point during their marriage.  And these numbers are probably on the conservative side, when you consider that close to half of all marriages end in divorce.
  • Research consistently shows that 2 to 3% of all children are the product of infidelity.  And most of these children are unknowingly raised by men who are not their biological fathers.
  • Infidelity is becoming more common among people under 30.  Many experts believe this increase in cheating is due to greater opportunity (time spent away from a spouse) and young people developing the habit of having multiple sexual partners before they get married.
  • Some cultures have adopted extreme measures to combat infidelity: female circumcision, allowing only limited contact between the sexes, and death as a punishment.  While many other cultures view infidelity as more of a nuance, not a serious marital problem.
  • Men are more likely to cheat than women.  But, as women become more financially independent, women are starting to act more like men with respect to infidelity.
  • As more and more women enter the work force, “office romances” are becoming more common.  Spouses often spend more time with coworkers than with each other.
  • The internet, e-mail, and chat rooms are making it easier for people to engage in infidelity.
  • Emotional infidelity, compared to just physical infidelity, can inflict as much, if not more, hurt, pain and suffering.  And to make matters worse, most infidelity involves both physical and emotional betrayal.

Hebrews 13:4 – Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.

Our Sovereign Lord is very clear about this issue.  Adultery is sin and sin will not be tolerated by the Lord (Romans 5:6-10; 6:23).  Not only does the Lord share with us His decree on the issue but also shares with us in Proverbs 5 detail as to what sexual sin will cost one who engages in this act.  Please notice with me.

Sexual sin will affect you physically (5:9, 11; 6:34–35)

Your energy will be sapped through guilt (Ps. 32:3–4). The aggrieved spouse may seek revenge, perhaps taking your life (6:34–35). Sexually transmitted diseases appear to be another God-ordained consequence of immorality.

Sexual sin will ruin you financially (5:10; 6:26a, 30–31; 29:3)

Immorality is expensive. The adulteress takes financial advantage of her victims. Many men have squandered small fortunes on food, gifts, and hotels. Others have been blackmailed by scorned lovers who threatened to reveal the truth to the innocent spouses. Many have squandered large sums through cyber-sex and phone sex. Few experiences in life are more expensive than divorce, which is often the result of immorality.

Sexual sin will destroy your reputation (5:14; 6:33)

The good name that you have spent a lifetime protecting can be lost in one night. While our culture as a whole often embraces immorality, the community of the righteous upholds God’s standards.

Sexual sin will break apart your family (5:16–17)

You will lose the trust and respect of your spouse and children. You may wind up divorced and alone. You may father illegitimate children, depriving them of the blessings of being raised by a mother and father in a God-fearing home. You may infect your wife with a sexually transmitted disease.

Your sin will find you out (6:27–29; Num. 32:23)

When you begin dabbling with sin. You fear lightning will fall from the sky; but when it does not, you become more brazen. You are playing with fire (6:27). It is just a matter of time before your judgment comes. Ultimately you will be hit, not by Cupid’s arrow, but by God’s arrow of judgment (7:22–23, 26–27).

Exodus 20:14 – “You shall not commit adultery.

Godly wisdom trains you to stay far away from sexual temptation.

She teaches you to guard your heart (4:23; 7:3, 25). She warns you not to even desire what is not yours (Matt. 5:27–28; Exod. 20:17). Lust in the heart gives birth to sin, resulting in death (James 1:14–15). Take responsibility for what you allow to enter your Eye- and Ear-gates. Take radical action to avoid temptation (Matt. 5:29; 2 Tim. 2:22). Wisdom exhorts you to stay as far away as possible from sexual sin (5:8). I have heard it said, ‘Those who fall into immorality usually don’t fall far.’ Set standards for your relationships with the opposite sex and the entertainment to which you expose yourself. Don’t be naive, thinking that you could never fall sexually. ‘Let him who thinks he stands take heed that he does not fall’ (1 Cor. 10:12).

As you can see, sexual sin will cost you more than you want to pay.  Instead, why not begin to invest in your marriage and discover how the Lord will enrich and bless you abundantly.  I pray we all will take heed of these ancient words before it is too late.

May God bless you richly!

 
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Posted by on June 5, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

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Suggestions For A Strong Marriage #3 – “A Godly Husband”

11 May

For the past few weeks I have been sharing some suggestions for your consideration in order to strengthen marriages.  I have been amazed at how the Lord has used these thoughts to touch the hearts and lives of so many.  Thank you for your willingness to contact me and share your thoughts, concerns, and hurts.  I have been praying for each of you.

Suggestion #3 – Strong marriages have men who follow the Biblical model given to them by Christ.

Ephesians 5:22-33 states, “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”

Please notice a few observations from this passage.

The husband is the head of the family (vs. 23)

This implies authority; however, this authority is qualified.  The husband is head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. Being the head means he is vitally interested in her.  He is her protector. The husband is to provide the needs of his wife.   He is also to lead his wife and not boss her.  As husbands we must lead as Christ lead; from the position of a servant.  The authority given to husbands is not his.  It comes from God and is a gift.  He must be a good steward.  As husbands, we will be accountable for how we lead our families.

The husband should love his wife (vs. 25)

The husband is commanded to love his wife with the same type of love which Christ has for the church.  This love was a sacrificial type of love as Christ gave himself on the cross for the church. As a husband we must not have the attitude, “What can my wife do for me?” but, “What can I do for her?” A Godly husband must not be a tyrant. He must have a love for his wife, which is ready to make any sacrifice for her good.

 A husband should live in consideration of his wife.

1 Peter 3:7 shares with us, “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”

God is pleading for men to come to know their wife so well that he may consider her needs in all things.  I have shared this passage for men for many years (and I have read it to constantly remind myself) of the need to get to know their wives on a deeper, more personal level.  There are five questions of which husbands need to know the answers.

  1. What does my wife need?
  2. What makes my wife happy?
  3. What makes my wife nervous?
  4. What makes my wife feel relaxed?
  5. What makes my wife anxious or depressed?

Dr. James Dobson addresses the issue of depression in his book, “What Wives Wish Their Husbands Knew About Women.”  Wives wish their husbands understood:

  • Low self-esteem
  • Fatigue and time pressure
  • Loneliness and isolation
  • Absence of romantic love
  • Financial difficulties
  • Sex problems
  • Menstrual and physiological problems
  • Problems with children
  • Aging

I also want to suggest some things a husband should do in order to make sure their wife always feels great about choosing to marry them!

  • Hug and kiss your wife every morning.
  • Tell her that you love her and give her a kiss before you leave for work.
  • Show courtesy – 47% of the wives say their husbands omit courtesy.
  • Call her during the day to see how she is doing.
  • After work, call her before you leave for home so that she can know when to expect you.
  • Praise her.
  • Bring her flowers once in a while as a surprise (be sure to include a card that expresses your love for her.)
  • Be gentle, tender.
  • Help with the dishes after dinner.
  • Be truthful.
  • Remember special occasions such as dates, anniversaries, and birthdays with gifts that are sentimental, not practical. Learn how to shop for “your” wife.
  • Don’t criticize her.
  • Ask her regularly what you can do to help. Better yet, see something that needs to be done and do it yourself.
  • When you arrive home from work, give her a hug and kiss and spend a few minutes talking to her about how her day went.
  • Hug and kiss her every night, before you both go to sleep.
  • Special times to give special attention:
  •            When the children are ill
  •            When she is ill
  •            During “that time of the month”

“For some strange reason, human beings (and particularly women) tolerate stresses and pressures much more easily if at least one other person knows they are enduring it.”       – James Dobson

A good husband always strive to be aware of…

  • Cruelty, crudeness, offensive language or jokes
  • Not recognizing her attempts to please you
  • Unfavorable comparisons with other women
  • Rejection of her opinions as unimportant, makes her unimportant
  • Hurting her feelings

A husband should honor his wife

A great husband remembers that his wife is made in the image of God. (Gen 1:27) Each husband must each make up their mind she will have a permanent place of honor in their life – because she is Christ’s.  1 Corinthians 11:11-12 reads, “Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man nor man of woman; for as woman was made from man, so man is now born or woman.  And all things are from God.”

I am deeply convicted that when husbands learn to soften their hearts and open their minds to the blueprint given from God, they will begin to experience His peace and harmony promised through obedient living.  There is such a dire need for all men everywhere to reexamine and evaluate their own walk with God and seek His will within their marriage relationship.

May God continue to bless you richly and all of us who are husbands, that we will learn to live a life of obedience and submission.

 
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Posted by on May 11, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

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Suggestions for a Strong Marriage #1 – “Learn to Kill Your Selfishness”

18 Apr

I am saddened to learn of so many marriages currently under attack.  It seems as through more and more people (Christian and non-Christian) are splitting up, separating, and/or filing for divorce.  Recent statistics are very alarming.  According to statistics from divorcerate2011.com,

  • Almost 49 percent of the marriages end up in divorces
  • First marriages end up in divorces in an average duration of just less than 8 years
  • 60 percent of all divorces are related to individuals aged 25 to 39
  • There were more than 21 million divorces in the year 2000. In the same year, 58 million couples were married and still lived separated
  • The average male age for a second divorce was 40.4 years and the average female age was 37.3 years in 1990
  • The divorce rate of first time marriages is almost 10 percent lesser than the divorce rate for second marriages
  • Over a 40 year period, 67 percent of first marriages terminate in a divorce and 50 percent of these divorces take place within the first 7 years
  • Every year more than 1 million children are affected by divorce

Researchers across our great country are often left scratching their heads wondering, “What can be done to reduce (even eliminate) the growing number of marriages which are in turmoil?”  “What measures need to be taken to allow more marriages to remain strong and last for a lifetime?”

I do not want to try and oversimplify what can be done but I do feel the need to share with anyone who will read this article my personal conviction on this sensitive and delicate issue.  It is my intent to spend three articles in what I feel God wants us to understand in order to establish marriages which will serve as a legacy to our children and throughout our communities.

Suggestion #1 – Learn to Kill Your Selfishness

Selfishness has been defined as, “Concerned chiefly or only with oneself without regard for the well-being of others.”

I ask that you take a few minutes and read 2 Samuel 11:1-27; 12:1-14, 18-19.  This passage of Scripture is the sinful encounter between David and Bathsheba.  Within this context, we see where David’s selfishness caused nothing but pain, anguish, and even death for many of those involved in this lustful scene from history.

The Bible speaks frequently about the need for each of us to kill our selfishness.

Luke 9:23 – “And he (Jesus) said to all, If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.”

John 13:1-7 – “Now before the Feast of the Passover, when Jesus knew that his hour had come to depart out of this world to the Father, having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. During supper, when the devil had already put it into the heart of Judas Iscariot, Simon’s son, to betray him, Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he had come from God and was going back to God, rose from supper. He laid aside his outer garments, and taking a towel, tied it around his waist. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around him. He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Lord, do you wash my feet?” Jesus answered him, “What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand.”

Knowing what we must do and understanding how to do it are often two different things.  I want to suggest four things that we all must do in order to have strong relationships with not only our spouse; but with everyone we encounter.  Most importantly, this is vital to have a healthy spiritual relationship with our Father in Heaven.

You must allow God to change you.

Consider Paul’s words in 2 Corinthians 5:17 – “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.”  Paul is reminding the Corinthians brethren that they are now changed; they are different than they were before they became a child of God.  They are no longer living like the world but they are acting like Christ in all that they do and say.  Jesus reminds us in John 15:5, “I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.”  When we learn to abide in Christ, we are learning how to become selfless by allowing God to work in us and through us.

You must change the way you view yourself.

Paul states in Galatians 2:20 – “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me“.  It is so very humbling when we fully come to grasp that another man died to set us free from our bondage of sin and eternal damnation.  However, we must not allow His death to be in vain.  We must understand that we are valuable and precious to God.  In Colossians 3:1-10 we read were we need to set our minds on things above.  Thereby killing our earthly/sinful way of living and producing a life which brings glory and honor to Him.

You must change the way you view others.

One of my favorite passages of Scripture dealing with how we view others is found in John 9:1-7.  I am intrigued how the apostles were concerned with the details of whose sin caused this young boy to be born blind.  I love seeing how Christ was all about His Father’s work.  Notice that the disciples were more interested in having a theological discussion than they were in helping a person in need.  The apostles are rebuked for their lack of vision.  Notice with me how the disciples learned from this experience and changed their perspective in Acts 3:1-10.  You can see firsthand how they learned from Christ in how to properly view other people.   They no longer viewed others as a topic for theological discussion but instead as an opportunity to display the power of God at work.

I believe the challenge for each of us is to learn to think like Christ.  We need to continually ask ourselves, “What would Jesus do in this situation?”  “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men.” (Philippians 2:4-7).

You must pray for guidance.

There is nothing more powerful than prayer.  The ability to bring our petitions and needs before a sovereign and loving Father is something which should never be ignored.  Proverbs 2:1-5 – “My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you, making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding; yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding, if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures, then you will understand the fear of the LORD and find the knowledge of God.”  This father wanted his son to come to understand the source of wisdom and understanding.  He is reminding the son of his need to first seek the Lord in all his ways.  Jesus adds to this thought in John 15:7 – “If you remain in me, and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.”  What a blessing to know that if we abide in Him and His word is in us that whenever we strive to imitate Jesus that whatever we ask will be given to each of us.

We will never have a successful marriage until we destroy our selfishness.  Are you selfish?  Can you truly say that you are a new creature living for God?  Can you say that your true intention is to make the life of your spouse the best it can be?  May we do whatever is necessary to rid our lives of selfishness and may it not be found present in our marriages.  By learning to love our spouse and to put them before ourselves will go a long way in having dynamic marriages and relationships with one another.

May God bless you richly.

 
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Posted by on April 18, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

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Might It Be Sin?

20 Mar

I often find myself in Biblical discussions with other Christians who easily become frustrated when they conclude the Bible to be silent on a certain issues.  They often walk away curious if a choice or action which Scripture doesn’t specifically address is permissible or sinful.  We understand that Christ has given us everything that we need to live a righteous life and to have eternal life.  Peter proclaims, “His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence” (2 Peter 1:3).  But how can we ensure our choices and actions are in accordance with righteous living?  What can we do to make sure that we are not participating in behaviors and/or actions the world may accept but might be displeasing to God?  It is beneficial for each of us to ask ourselves a few simple questions to aid us in making proper decisions.

THE SCRIPTURAL TEST: Does the Bible endorse it, or does the Word of God expressly forbid it?

THE PURPOSE TEST:  Will this choice further my quest to glorify Christ in all things?

THE PERSONAL TEST: Will doing this make me personally more like Jesus or less?

THE SOCIAL TEST: Will doing this influence others to be better or worse Christians?

THE PRACTICAL TEST: Will the results of my doing this be desirable?

THE UNIVERSAL TEST: If everyone were to do this, would it improve or degrade soci­ety?

THE STEWARDSHIP TEST: Will my doing this waste the time or talent that God has given me?

THE CHARACTER TEST: What will be the influence of this on my moral and spiritual stamina?

THE FAMILY TEST: Will it bring discredit and dishonor to my family, and will it em­barrass them?

THE PUBLICITY TEST: Would I want friends, fellow Christians, and church leaders to know about it?

THE COMMON SENSE TEST: Does it agree with just plain every day, ordinary common sense?

THE FAIRNESS TEST: Is it honest, and is it practicing the golden rule toward each per­son?

THE HISTORICAL TEST: Has this choice helped or hurt those who have made it in the past?

It is important to remember that just because something doesn’t violate our conscience doesn’t mean it is permissible.  The prophet Isaiah stated, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord” (Isaiah 55:8).  I am convinced I will always have questions about Scripture but take refuge in the words of God through Moses, “The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things that are revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may do all the words of this Law” (Deuteronomy 29:29).  May we all take the time to consider our actions, words, and choices so we may each live life worthy of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

 

 
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Posted by on March 20, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

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A Father’s Prayer

10 Mar

“Pray then like this: ”Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.  And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. (Matthew 6:9-13)

One of the highlights of my day occurs at 8:15pm.  Each night my wife and I assemble on our knees around our son’s bed to pray as a family.  Connor usually begins each prayer the same, “Thank you for our faith, family, friends, and food.”  Then he will state the name of every relative on both sides of his family.  Lately he has begun venturing out a bit more and has started including his church clothes, water, and baby sister.

Prayer is a primary part of our family structure.  Before Susan and I were pregnant with our first child we would petition daily for God’s blessing.  After our son was born, we would pray over him almost nightly for the wisdom and discernment needed to become great parents.  Even now we are praying for the arrival of our daughter; for her health, disposition, and faith development.

Recently, I was looking through some of my sermon/devotional files on my computer and came across some Scriptures which have impacted me on several different levels.  These sections of text has challenged me to begin praying for these spiritual attributes for my children, myself, and to anyone who will listen.  They are becoming a part of my daily prayer and I hope they will be part of yours as well.

Adoration

Notice the psalmists words in Psalm 95:1-5, “Oh come, let us sing to the LORD; let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation! Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving; let us make a joyful noise to him with songs of praise! For the LORD is a great God, and a great King above all gods.  In his hand are the depths of the earth; the heights of the mountains are his also.  The sea is his, for he made it, and his hands formed the dry land.”

I long for our children to look at the physical creation all around them and come to realize there is a master designer who formed everything they can see, smell, hear, and touch.  I pray it will be a factor in awakening a deep desire to personally come to know Him and His will.  Isn’t it a great feeling to be able to approach the throne of God and pour out our hearts in praise and adoration unto our great God? It is my desire for all people to come to know God and to give Him the praise He is due.

Celebration

Notice Paul’s words to Timothy in 1 Timothy 1:15-17, “The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost. But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life. To the King of ages, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory forever and ever.”

We each have a very real problem (Romans 3:23).  It is a problem that we could do nothing about.  The problem is destructive, devastating, and has eternal consequences (Romans 6:23).  What is the problem you ask?  The problem is sin.  But there is good news.  The good news is that God has provided a way of escape.  The solution is Jesus (2 Corinthians 5:21; 1 Timothy 2:5-6; Romans 6:3-6).  Once we have been cleansed of our sin through the obedience to the gospel we are free from the condemnation that was before us (Romans 5:6-10).

I can think of no greater reason to rejoice than to celebrate in Christ Jesus for the atonement He paid for all mankind.  Once we come to the point of understanding that we are now free from an eternity in Hell, our lives will be a celebration each time we remember what was done on our behalf.

Confession

John writes in 1 John 1:9 – “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

It is my prayer for my children to be transparent in their relationship with God.  I long for them to possess the proper character and to become salt and light in a dark and depressing world (Matthew 5:13-16).  The church needs more people to openly confess both verbally and nonverbally that they are a child of God.  The world needs to see true Christianity on display through our children and not the lukewarm faith portrayed by far too many within the church (Revelation 3:16).

Guidance

The 23rd Psalm reads, “The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever.”

This psalm portrays so many wonderful attributes of our Heavenly Father.  Personally, I find peace in knowing that I may find guidance in my walk with God.  Satan is doing everything he can to lure people away from the Lord.  Far too often, worldly pleasures and its enticements are the guiding force in our lives.  One of my greatest fears isn’t failing; but succeeding in things which really don’t matter.  I pray my children will come to understand that God’s Word is a light unto their path and will lead them into a life of love, hope, and peace with our Father up above.

Protection

We find these words in Psalm 27:1-5, “The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? When evildoers assail me to eat up my flesh, my adversaries and foes, it is they who stumble and fall. Though an army encamp against me, my heart shall not fear; though war arise against me, yet I will be confident. One thing have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple. For he will hide me in his shelter in the day of trouble; he will conceal me under the cover of his tent; he will lift me high upon a rock.”

I must openly admit.  When I was told the first time that we were have a son I was nervous.  When I was told we were having a daughter I was scared to death.  The reason is simple.  There are so many hurtful people in the world and I can’t always protect my children from evil.  But the one thing I do, is pray for the Lord to protect my children.  Paul wrote in Philippians 4:19, “And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.”  I can think of no greater need as a parent than for our God to help protect our children.

Submission

James 4:13-15 proclaims, “Come now, you who say, ”Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit”– yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.  Instead you ought to say, ”If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.”

Even though I became a Christian many years ago, it wasn’t until quite some time later that I came to realize my deep need to submit to the will of God.  Submission can be a scary and often difficult thing for a person to do.  However; once we learn to submit to His will and to follow His word our lives take on deeper meaning and develop stronger peace within our individual lives.

Supplication

Paul penned these words in Philippians 4:5-7, “Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

I pray my children will learn to depend on the Lord just like the men and women of faith in times past.  I pray they can learn from the wilderness wanderings in the Exodus account and see how the Israelites depended (some of the time) for their physical needs (food, water, clothing).  I also pray they will come to heed the words of Jesus in Matthew 6:25ff and not live lives filled with anxiety but learn to pray and depend on God for all the things they need.

I pray these Scriptures and thoughts have served as a source of encouragement to you.  I want to challenge you to pray for these spiritual attributes to be seen in each of us and especially our children.  May God bless you richly.

 
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Posted by on March 10, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

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